Finally I remembered this blog and decides to write. Now I know why I don't write that much. It is because I tend to overthink and with writing about my feelings I will explore my emotions and may overthink about things I actually don't need to worry. But I'll give it a shot though.

Life is good. What can I say? First and foremost, I am still alive and breathing. I have my loving family and friends. I have a nice and fun boyfriend. Yes I know in the past he was the source of my emotional thoughts but nowadays I learn to just let it go. It sure gets better. My academic life is good, better than I expected. I still maintain high GPA in the last semester's hell. I was a research intern at Demographic Institute. That could go way better but I was too damn lazy and I don't give my A game but yeah what can I do now. Still unsure about where I want to work in the future but that is okay. The best part is: I am finally going on an exchange, and to Japan! (yay)

This is what I want throughout my life.. Living international. Sure I have doubts, like what if something really bad happens when I am in Japan, whether I can maintain long distance relationship and make sure my boyfriend is doing good.. Well, I do said that I tend to overthink. And screw that. I will just go to Japan. Hopefully everything is okay, I haven't got my COE. Will get it early March and it is just so close to the day I will go. If I don't get it I can't go to Japan or study at school so I will just take a break. This is such a leap of faith.

I learned so much past year. Especially by being in a relationship. I learn not to expect much, and it is not a bad thing. I am not lowering my standards. It is to appreciate little things and not to put pressure on both the people and my relationship with the people. I also learned to control my emotions and not being annoying.. I try to be more considerate and compromise. Then I learned to just let everything happens the way it should. No rush or pressure. I am fully aware that the string is loose, and it can go to different directions. I am okay with it. Not everything has to be perfect. Life is a journey and I must accept what happens instead of regretting what is not going to happen. Right? I am such a shaman right now.

Well, hopefully, hopefully, hopefully... Everything will be okay. And if it is not, I will be okay with it.